Don’t be alarmed if your child is still swallowing their toothpaste. Spitting is a surprisingly complex skill. It requires coordination of lots of the mouth’s muscles, the tongue, and the controlled exhalation of air from the lungs. On top of that, kids also need the cognitive understanding of why we spit and when to do it appropriately. That’s a lot to learn at once.

Age 2 is probably the earliest we might start to see this skill emerge, but it can take years to master. It’s completely normal for children to still be learning how to spit at age 4 or beyond.

Here’s how you can help in ways that feel achievable and pressure-free.

1. Model it
Brush your own teeth alongside your child and clearly show them how you spit out toothpaste when your mouth feels full. Do a big, funny, exaggerated spit and make a clear “t” sound as you do it. Kids learn so much by watching what our bodies do.

2. Explain it
Don’t underestimate their understanding. When explanation is paired with modelling, it becomes very powerful. You might say, “Uh oh, my mouth feels full, I need to spit it out.” When they’re brushing, help them notice that full feeling too. “Your mouth looks full of foam. Spitting time!”

3. Practise through play
Practise spitting when it doesn’t really matter. The shower is a great place to start. Take turns filling your mouth with water and spitting it out. If that feels tricky, begin with focusing on not swallowing. Just opening their mouth and letting the water dribble out is a great first step. The garden can be another safe practice space. In our house we keep the rule of “you can spit in the bathroom or the garden”.

4. Use routine language
Predictable language helps kids anticipate what’s coming. Use the same phrase during play and toothbrushing, like “one, two, three, spit!” You could also sing a made up song that stays the same each time. “Brush brush brush brush brush brush brush and then we need to spit!” Repetition really helps this skill stick.

5. Target practice
Put something fun in the sink that they can aim at, like a toy or a sticker. Encourage them to spit their foamy toothpaste towards the target and praise every attempt, even if it doesn’t quite get there. Make a funny noise, be playful, and keep it light so they want to keep trying.

Be patient. New skills take time, and this one develops slowly for many kids.

You’ve got this.